Don’t be that girl – the one who dates assholes all the time and complains about guys being assholes.

I’ve seen and heard it so much, I had to write a helpful guide for girls to find better mates:


If you keep fishing in the same pond, you’ll keep getting the same fish.

Translation: stop picking up dudes in the same places you go – clubs, bars. Find some through a co-ed sports league or a house party with your friends.



Guys are like Pavlov’s dogs. Whatever behavior you reward, you will get more frequently.

Translation: if you continue having sex with guys who treat you like shit, you will continue to be treated like shit. By the current guy you’re sleeping with and all the others who want to sleep with you. They see you rewarding his atrocious behavior with access to your vagina, so they will emulate that behavior in hopes of also receiving access.



There are more than two choices. The Asshole vs The Nice Guy is the same false dichotomy as Democrat vs Republican.

Translation: There’s a spectrum. Like everything in life – it’s not one or the other. There are plenty of good guys who aren’t pushovers. They are confident, decisive, and interesting. They also happen to be sweet, caring and compassionate men.

Because that’s honestly what an evolved man is: confident, decisive, interesting, sweet, generous, kind, thoughtful and well-rounded.

The traits you find attractive are prevalent in narcissistic, self-absorbed assholes. True. Which is why you keep finding yourself in that same situation. But if you look a little harder, spend a little effort – you’ll find a lot of those traits in good men. And there’s plenty of good men in this world.


For the sake of humanity, please spend that little extra effort to find and have sex with good men. We need them to be the fathers of the next generation, not those assholes you’ve been banging.